Complaining is an act of magic!
I am fascinated with energy and how it works.
I was browsing through an old Llewellyn’s 2017 Magical Almanac and found a nine page article by Melissa Tipton entitled “The power of a complaining fast” in which she explains that complaining is a powerful act of magic.
The ingredients for effective magic are a clearly defined intention, focus, and energy to power the working.
Let’s look at how complaining qualifies as an act of magic.
Sabine is seriously thinking about breaking up with her boyfriend. She feels he is not supportive, and she thinks he may be cheating on her. She complains to anyone who will listen and when she is alone she obsesses about what is not working in her relationship. If her audience agrees with her, they add energy to fuel the intent.
Melissa says " the act of repeatedly focusing on her unhappy situation is no different from someone visualizing a positive outcome that they wish to manifest. The difference, as my mother once heard a pastor say, is that “complaining is praying for what you don’t want.” "
Chronic complainers manifest a never ending trail of unhappy situations to complain about.
To break the cycle they must learn how to express frustration in a healthy way by experiencing the feelings directly without acting out and harming themselves or others. Complaining allows them to distance themselves from the emotional experience by creating a story that gives them a false sense of control over the situation.
Another reason for complaining is the fallacy that they think they are doing something to solve the problem; instead, their words, coupled with the intense focus and energy, just create more of the same problems.
If the urge to complain arises, they must abstain by snapping a rubber band on their wrist, or physically moving away from the area to reset their consciousness and choose a different course of action.
A fast from complaining for about a month will repattern their habits. Their energy will shift from fueling undesirable situations to manifesting the life they want.
I’m kidding. I don’t think any of my friends have ever called me a complainer, ever.
I have had some people in my life who have seen all “negative” talk as complaining, which I definitely don’t agree with. If I didn’t point out the problems, I’d be like them, pretending that there aren’t any or that there’s nothing that can be done to solve them.
However, since I don’t agree with them that anything negative is complaining, it’s kind of a moot point. Complaining is complaining, pointing out the problems that do exist is just talking about life. Apples and oranges.
So, I guess the answer is no, I won’t start complaining.
Consider the source of the definition of an action being “complaining.” It may be a cry for help from someone who has nowhere else to turn or doesn’t know what else to do to help themselves.
I agree. As I have been accused of complaining when crying out for things we all deserve. By a narcissist. So yeah. Depends who it’s from. Also many times people don’t know who someone is behind closed doors. Calling someone a complainer and presenting as perfect but a monster behind closed doors
Interesting. I think it’s a matter of balance. If you’re complaining just because that’s become a part of you, it can be damaging and lead you down a spiral of never seeing the joy in anything. But, if your complaint causes change, then it’s a positive step towards a better life for you and the others that come after you. Just my view.
I agree with this - the key here is finding healthy ways to handle it. Spewing negativity but then refusing to do anything to remedy it is just that - spewing negativity. It’s likely to do more harm to yourself (and to those around you) than move anything forward.
Recognizing that something is a problem is a big step. Sharing that with people who can help is another step (although it’s debatable if reaching out for help counts as “complaining” - like Devenne wisely said, that would depend on your definition of the word). But reaching out isn’t the place to stop - after that, action needs to be taken to continue to move along the path to improvements.
Definitely! This was a great point to ponder on. I think you’re right that complaining is a form of manifestation, and worth being mindful about.
I think these categories are a good guideline for distinguishing those who are reaching out for help versus stagnant “complaining” behavior.
Seeing them written out and categorized is helpful - if someone begins to slip into “complaining” (as, I think, many of us do during difficult times - it can happen to anyone when life gets tough) this guideline presents ways to shift behaviors. You’ve got some great plans of action here for how to move forward during a difficult time.
Thank you for your insights, @bj1 - this has given me a lot to think about!
Gonna keep complaining? 
