Congrats to Coven Challenge Entry

I’m going to preface this by saying that there is talk about depression & mental health issues.

I joined Spells8 & the forum in July of 2020. At the time, I had no idea what I was looking for out of life. So many things had happened in rapid succession that were major life changes, with Covid right in the middle. I felt like someone had ripped me apart & I was trying to stay together or put myself back together.

There was a lot of self-reflection of some kind, more of the who am I kind than anything else. I was in a dark place. I didn’t know which end was up, what I should do or say, there were so many questions about how to move forward. I had even thought of leaving my home & going somewhere else because my family would be better off without me here.

I was talking to my friend & he had mentioned that I was so very different. I wanted to be me again. We talked about things we “used to” do who I was at a very different time in my life, before children. However, I had my own groove that I missed because I dropped everything about me to be a mom it had seemed. I had lost myself along the way & the events of 2018 through 2020 were just too heavy for me. So much had changed the way of my life. I wanted something that said I was still me.

When I was a teenager, I dabbled in witchcraft with a very good friend of mine. When I left that part of my life behind, witchcraft stayed with it. My children came & I moved to a different part of my state because my son had ongoing issues with a congenital birth defect, neurological effects, & we were sorting that out with my 2nd son recently born. At the same time, my mom & Nana were very sick with cancers & I was trying to hold it together to help my Dad when I could & still go to Sunday dinners. So witchcraft became a thing of the past. I just simply didn’t have the time or energy for anything after my day was done. I was working full time, going to & from the city with my son for specialist appointments, & trying to keep a home.

So back in July of 2020, after talking to my friend, I wanted something to feel like I was me again. I was looking up things on Wicca, Paganism, all of it. Trying to find something that could explain it to me & I stumbled upon the courses from Spells8 in my search & started poking around. I joined the site & then popped into the forum. I had found my people. I went through the courses as I found them & practiced the Daily Ritual & Coffee Consecration. I tried new teas & started putting together my Book of Shadows. It started as 1 binder & now it is separated into 3 binders & a Book of Mirrors. I learn a lot when something catches my interest but then I want to learn it all, & all at once. So I learned to pace myself. I learn it as it comes now. I have a focus when I am doing things.

I still went through my depression, I had to feel what I felt to move forward instead of trying to avoid it. But I had help. I would get disconnected from things but I always wanted to stay connected to Spells8 & the forum. The forum had taken over as my social media. Then I swung back & forth between FaceBook, Instagram, & the forum. Now I have made it through the worst of my depression & I am getting better every day. I feel a lot more present & more like I know who I am & where I am going. The forum was here for me through a few disconnects & listened to me & distracted me. I have made some great friendships & wouldn’t change them for the world.

Weekly Witchy CHALLENGE - Congrats to the Coven! :confetti_ball:

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And we’re so glad you found us, @Siofra! You’ve grown by such leaps and bounds yet stayed the kind, caring person you are at your core. I’m proud of you!

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Oh, thank you @Amethyst. I tried my hardest to keep that part of what was going on with me out of the coven. I had a lot happen & was trying to keep my bearings. It means a lot to me that you have such wonderful words for me!

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I love this story :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: I’ve had my own mental health struggles over the years so I know what you mean :heartpulse: I did not know you when you first joined the Coven but of what I do know now I think you are an amazing person :heartpulse:

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Thank you @Liisa You are a great person also! I manage okay now. It was like getting hit once every 3 months with a bat that knocked you back 20 steps & you could only move forward 1 at a time. I eventually hit a wall over the course of a month and a half where everything in my life was just hitting me over & over again. I finally got up & dusted myself off & everything seemed to make sense. My friend said I had a spiritual awakening somewhere in there & the universe pushed me off a cliff but caught me when I finally fell. Keeping it together & getting back in touch with who I am & my family who lived through me withdrawing was the hardest part. There have been many conversations with them about what is going on with me & how I am doing. At the same time, some amazing opportunities came out on the other side. I have 2 trips planned. 1 in 2022 & 1 in 2023. So I’m working on getting ready for those. It’s exciting to see what has come my way since hitting the wall.

Sorry, I’m rambling. Chatty Kathy over here. :hugs: :heart:

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You’ve come so far, became a wonderful witch as well as friend and mom. I’m so glad to have you with us.

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Oh thank you! I feel like I’ve come a long way & like this is part of my home now. Definitely who I am & have been. You are great friend & witch also!

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Aww, thank you! You’re very sweet. I’ve got to write up my challenge thing today so I can post it.

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@Siofra See, wonderful! I told you that you would write something great :grin:.
As @Amethyst said we are so glad you found Spells8.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us,
Blessed Be,

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Thank you @Rowan. I don’t know how great it is, but it’s a synopsis of my journey here. I’m happy that I found Spells8 & the forum. I have learned a lot & met great people along the way. :heart:

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I remember when we first started talking you and I were both going through some stuff. I watched as you lifted up so many around you and I marveled at your love for others and your embrace of the craft. Back in December I listed you by name as one of the reasons I am thankful for this coven and I still feel that way today. Even though I have been flakey as my life goes through this wild change, you are always checking in and I have to say you are a true heart of this forum.

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Thank you! I appreciate everyone in the coven & the friendships that are the world to me. :heart:

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Beautifully written, @Siofra! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: You have really blossomed into your magickal craft over the months. You are such a strong witch who has overcome so much. It has been a joy watching you gain confidence and pride in your many wonderful talents! :sparkles:

Thank you so much for all of the light, positivity, and creativity you bring to the forum- I always look forward to seeing your posts! Through times both dark and light, may you continue to shine brightly! :candle::heart:

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Thank you! It’s not such a struggle anymore to do the simplest of tasks. I have learned a lot about myself & how to manage what I go through each day. I’m so happy for everyone here & the support from the coven when I was disconnected (more than once).

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