Death & Loss Advice?

So, I went home to my family’s this weekend and had a friend watch my cat & kitten. I’ve explained before that I’m in recovery from addiction. So are a lot of my friends. When I got home last night, I found my friend dead on my couch. He had overdosed. And even though I carry narcan, too much time had already passed. So it was a pretty traumatic experience to say the least. We met in recovery, he had been about 4-5 months sober. My best friend and her 9 year old were with me, but I realised what was wrong before her daughter walked in. Last night was a whirlwind of police interviews, explaining what happened & trying to hold myself together. I didnt stay at my apartment last night, and I thought I would want to get rid of my couch. But I did go there earlier to do cat litter & take a shower, and it was less uncomfortable than I had imagined.

Does anyone have any advice? I’ve dealt with a lot of deaths, I know how to process that. But not in my house, not seeing and touching him. Are there any spells or rituals anyone does or knows of that may make me feel less unsettled? Thanks in advance.

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I am so sorry that this happened. I wish I could give some advice right now - if anything comes to me I’ll let you know. For now, look after yourself :heart:

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So sorry to hear! I’m sure very traumatic! Like @Limeberry said, try to take care of yourself right now, one step at a time.
Blessed be

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I’m so sorry about your friend. It’s terrible to hear that this happened in your home.

Something you can do is create an altar dedicated to his memory for a safe journey into the afterworld. You could coordinate the ritual with the coming new moon.

Light white candles and incense, add some offerings. Tobacco is typically used as a powerful offering which you can burn also.

Another thing you can do is write a letter to him remembering fond memories, expressing joy, gratitude. You can place it on the altar or burn it as a way to release it.

Clear the energies in your home burning sage, cedar, palo santo, frankincense, whichever one you feel is right.

Whatever goes through your mind, you can write it down on your journal. It’s a good way to release some of the energy attached to these kind of situations.

I wish you all the best and hope this helps you.

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I’m sorry this happened to you, it must be terribly traumatic. Listen to @Francisco, he has good advice. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers. :pray:

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Oh man! I’m so sorry for your loss :disappointed: I can’t even begin to imagine what you went through. I have seen death but not of someone I cared for. Definitely do a cleansing. I’d recommend going through all the emotions. If you’re sad, cry. If you’re angry, punch or throw something. If you don’t know what to do then scream. Just get it out. Don’t try to hold it in! That can make it worse. But, whatever you do decide to do, know that you are NOT alone! :sparkling_heart::pray:t2:

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Oh @haley, I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your friend and the very traumatic experience it must have been. You’ve got some great advice from others here- I’ll offer what I can as well. I imagine right now you’re likely still in the shock phase and your emotions and feelings may be a bit dulled- definitely let out your emotions as they surface! I would urge you to seek help and find others you can console in. Talk about the situation with your best friend who was there and maybe any others who were close to your lost friend. Build a network of support and know that if you need it, reaching out for further help from a counsellor is a sign of strength, not weakness.

As for magickal advice, I would recommend a larger scale ritual with the couch in the center. Use salt, candles (purple can help to connect with spirits of the dead), and any items that you have that were special to your friend. In addition to the ritual Francisco mentioned above, the Farewell Ritual: Spell for a Deceased Loved One and also the Prayer for the Departed could also help to give you inspiration for a suitable ritual.

After the ritual, definitely cleanse! The whole apartment if you can. I think getting rid of the couch is a good idea if it is possible to do so. Removing it will help to cleanse the space and assist with any mental blockage preventing you from moving on. If you choose to stay in the apartment, a small permanent altar for your friend is a wonderful idea.

Again, I am so sorry this happened. I am sending you big hugs- please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Reach out if you need a boost- we are all here to support you too! Love and light to you, Haley. Be well! :pray:

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I am sorry that you had this experience. Sending Love and Healing Light to you and your friends family.

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Thank you, all of you. It’s been a rough few days, and I am most definitely still in shock. I haven’t cried since Sunday night, when it just came in waves of shocked silence and crushing tears. I do see a therapist weekly, so I called her yesterday & our normal appointment is today. All that I’m trying to do is let myself feel what I need to feel. And I really appreciate all of the advice on rituals I’m going to set some stuff up for an altar for him. That’s not really anything I thought about but it is a great idea! I’m doing my best so just keep me in your thoughts guys!

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So good that you have therapy today - I hope it is helpful. I’ve often found writing my thoughts down a few hours before a session to help get in the right mindset to open up and make the most of your time - it could be useful if you’re in a numb/shock state.
Keeping you in my thoughts :heart:

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I’m glad you have someone professional to talk to. That should help you a lot. Just don’t try to bottle it up, that’s not good for you. I’ll be keeping you in my thoughts. :hugs:

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You’re not alone! Be present, stay healthy!

I like Limeberry’s suggestion of keeping a journal. It’s great that you have someone there to talk about it! Put everything into words to help process it and heal!

My energy is with you! @haley :pray: :raised_hands:

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I’m glad to hear you’re letting the emotions out in healthy ways as they come- you are so strong, Haley! :heart: It’s a lot to handle and process, so maybe take some time for extra self-care too. You are definitely in my thoughts and prayers- be well! :two_hearts:

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