I’m Nan (54) and I’ve been lurking around this site since early 2020. I was always a bit too shy to pop in and say hi when I temporarily joined last year but I figured I’d give it a go this time around.
In all honestly, I have been looking into or studying some aspects of the craft for close to 20 years but in the beginning I had to do it secretly because I was in an awful marriage that you would’ve thought took place in the burning times Fortunately for me, my ex was full of himself and left me for another woman, which turned out to be the best thing for me and my kids.
When I moved to Eugene, Oregon I met a woman on my first day here that would play a major role in rekindling my curiosity and thirst for knowledge for the craft and we used to spend hours and hours almost every day talking over coffee about magick, what my role in it might be and so much more but when Covid hit, even though we literally live 3 doors down, we stopped hanging out and talking much (Don’t worry, she’s fine and has just been busy helping other people).
I realized recently after I had missed doing rituals for several key dates that I am spiritually stagnant and I need help I haven’t felt “whole” for a long time now. I know it has a lot to do with last year but it’s not just that and I hope that in talking to all of you I will be able to find myself again and be more dedicated to my craft.
I can tell you I have never really successfully done a spell (that I know of) but I’ve had premonitions my whole life. They come mainly in dreams; when I was a kid everyday felt like deja vu but with age and 3 brain surgeries, even those have waned which of course makes me question my worth and magickal ability.
I’m hoping that by talking to you guys it will spark whatever has been missing and I can not only find myself again but also have a sense of community and fulfillment that I don’t really have right now. I’ve always wanted to be a part of a coven but due to health conditions and my anxiety issues after my surgeries, I have never really been able to.
Unfortunately, I won’t be in here as much at first because I have to sort out a computer issue. The one I’m on right now has a cracked screen and my other one’s video card (?) is blown, maybe? I have to find another one that will suit my needs but of course like everyone else, money is an issue, so I will keep looking until I find something I can afford that works but I can pop in from time to time on my phone as well. Hope to talk to you all soon and if there’s anyone here from Oregon, especially Eugene I’d love to try and meet up some time