Good Evening All,
I sat down at my desk tonight to do some witchy things (study,read, Book of Mirrors, etc) but I find myself sitting here scrolling through our forum feeling a bit sad for the friend I thought I had, who I had to unfriend today. Im not sad in my decision to unfriend them, because it was getting to the point of being too volatile for me due to being an empath. I’m sad that the friendship was not what I thought it was…Im sad that this person doesn’t see the wonderful qualities that I seen, Im sad because mental health disorders suck and make it so hard for those who have them and for those who care about them. And then I feel almost guilty because I just could not be the person they obviously needed in their life as a friend.
All the things I thought were true about the person and about our friendship were a jaded vision I guess, or the disorder robbed us both of them.
I hate when you meet someone and you just click so quickly, everything is great, and then one day they just do a complete 180 and are someone you’re left wondering “Who the hell are you?” You dont know who the real version is or is it the disorder you dont know?
This person had been going through some tough moments and I tried…I tried to lift them up I tried to remind them how great they were and tried to get them to a better place even if only for a moment in that conversation. But I failed…after our conversation I just felt so heavy, couldn’t think, they were so entangled in my every thought; " I hope she is okay" “Did I say that right, or will she get offended?” thoughts like that. I felt myself just getting sad and tired… I got up jumped in the shower trying to just wash some of the funk away, but it lingered so I went to bed. The next morning, I had to work at having a good day, but doubtful thoughts intruded every quiet moment. I anxiously awaited a response but got none…so I made the choice to leave the friendship." Being an empath", another friend said “is both a blessing and a curse”, and this was the most truest words I heard today.
I hate the impression that just leaving the friendship gives, of me. But in my heart I know I had to…or I would just end up resenting the friendship that caused to much pain and strife.
I have to believe some people come into our lives for a while, some for a bit more, and some just need to be shown the door. I think both people learn/take from the moments what was needed or learned for another connection down the road.
So thank you friend for the lessons learned, Be well.
Blessed Be Everyone,
Good Evening All,
For me, letting go of someone close in my life was something I had to do awhile back and now that I think about it, being more selective of who you involve in your life is kind of a defining aspect of the Craft(at least for me). I don’t feel like I have time to let people slow me down anymore. May you recover quickly from this encounter. Instead of feeling too down about it, I would just try and see it as advancement that will lead to the improvement of life. I believe that life always keeps on getting better as long as you don’t give up.
Colin, Thank you. Im sorry you’ve experienced a similar situation and understand the weight it carries. You’re right, about being more selective.
Thank you also for the healing intent and the wise advice.
Sorry it didn’t work out. I believe that every soul meets for a reason. Although we may not know why, there is a reason.
My heart goes out to you, @Tamera- cutting people out of your life is a huge ordeal and causes a lot of pain and lingering doubts. But sometimes it’s like cutting off the sick part of a plant so that the rest of it can survive
It sounds like you put a lot of thought into the decision and you feel in your heart that it was the right thing to do- good for you! You are very strong. Something that may help you to feel more confident and stick with your decision is to do a peaceful Cord Cutting Ritual . It can help you to move on in a positive way.
Sending bigs hugs- you did the right thing! Blessed be
So sorry, I’ve been down this path too…in the end it was the best decision I had ever made. I did a lot of grounding work after and a cord cutting. I wanted to be free in all areas physically, mentally and energetically. Give yourself time to grieve the loss of the friendship. Most people just want to “let it go” --which is fine, if you have dealt with it, and made peace with it. If not it will rear its head again. I send healing light your way.
@SilverBear @TheTravelWitch thank you, I appreciate your support. I think I’m going to do the cord cutting, because I’m still thinking…what did they think when they realized I was gone from their life, etc. I didn’t want to hurt them but I couldn’t do it. Maybe they don’t really care, and I’m feeling too much…idk either way I know it was the thing to do.
Sending light your way. Cord cutting can be both difficult and freeing. What matters the most is no more harm is caused between two ex-friends and that your light doesn’t get dimmed by thoughts of “what if” and “if only”.
The first thing I want to say to you as someone who has multiple mental health diagnoses is this - no matter how hard you try, no matter what you do, please do not feel like it is on you to make this person feel better it might sound super harsh, but when I’m low like that (I have major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, OCD, and PTSD) nothing can pull me out of it. It’s something that just has to either run its course or be helped along with medication.
Please don’t feel bad for pulling yourself out of a friendship that made you feel bad. Their mental health is their responsibility, and you shouldn’t stay in a friendship that’s toxic just because one person is having a hard time. When that person becomes more stable in their mental health, I’m sure they would understand why you had to step away - and no one should blame you for doing so.
I also agree with doing a cord-cutting if you still feel like you have residual ties to this person that you don’t want or that are weighing you down.