My Matchmaker came today

[Garnet]

A little note, meant just for fun…

My matchmaker came today

When I was a child, I was told

You must find a husband before you get old

Stories and fairy tales gave me hope.

That everything would be fine, What a joke!

I would search and search for my Prince

Who ever said that, should be lynched

A witch to put me in a tower?

To me, that sounded pretty downer.

A prince will come and be your hero

Not true, they ended up being a zero

Many ‘heroes’ came and went

And to many a prince, I did vent

Billy Bob Jones said I could run his farm

40 acres to plow & then clean the barn

Showed him the door and I pulled out a gun

You should have seen that dumb yahoo run

The Earl of Shanghai La demanded 15 sons

and a dowry of 1400 pounds of honey buns?

I called my dogs to give him a thrashing

He bid me good day and to his limo went dashing.

And so I kept looking and seeing the suitors

But most of them acted more ike looters

One even asked me to turn around

Like he was buying me by the pound

Finally I shouted, “That is enough!”

I was firm and sounded really tough.

I will no longer do this every day

Put up with fools I will not let stay.

I can find a partner without your help.

Trying to make them understand how I felt.

I’m not a slave to be shown to the buyers

At least showing my teeth wasn’t required

I’m also no princess in search of a Prince

At that point the little old matchmaker flinched

I’d rather be alone sitting on a shelf

I am strong and can support myself

“She’s bold, rude and she has no grace,

I’m not a prude, but I must save face.”

And she marched out the door.

I looked at my mom and then with laughter we did roar.

That was over and I had won.

Defeating the matchmaker sure was fun.

I poured out drink, and saluted the back of her

So remember ladies…it’s never too late to run! Purrrr

Blessings

Garnet

[georgia]

I remember once, a grease bomb showed up at my door while Mom was at work. I was polite and invited him in. He made sexually harassing comments to everything I said and did, but I was as polite as I could be. As I walked him out to his car, I commented that I couldn’t understand why my mother thought he would be interested in me. He turned bright pink. Turns out Mom told him I was interested in him, though I’d never seen him before. She’d met him while he was working at a kiosk at the mall. I told her about the day and made her promise me she would never try to play matchmaker again. He was too embarrassed of his own attitude to ever show his face around me again. Would I have given him a second chance to make a first impression? We’ll never know. At least the strange male visitors whom I thought were for her stopped coming out of the woodwork.

Yeah. Mom wasn’t a good judge of character. She told me I was going to marry a man from school who had anger issues and ended up killing his step father in self defense. This young man told her I was the only person who could control him, but he chose to run from his deeds when I told him to get it taken care of and off his record. Never saw him again.

[Amethyst]

Wonderful! I’ve certainly run from Matchmakers all my life.

[Skycladpyxie]

Love it!