Hi my name is jackie and I am addict in recovery for the last 5yrs abd counting. I finally got sober after almost 20yrs on drugs.When I was in active addiction I made myself believe that this was it. This is what I become and will die this way. Being an addict really takes a toll on you. When you get clear headed you see all the damage that you left in your wake that now you have to fix. And then you start with all the guilt, shame, loneliness, sadness etc. And you try not to take it out on yourself but you do. Then a whole other set of problems set in. In the beginning of getting sober good things did happen. I built my relationship back with my sons and ended up helping my son take care of my grandkids which never thought i would ever see. I figured I can just bury myself in work, taking care of my grandson and endless tasks but at the end of the day all your doing is putting a bandaide over a gunshot. So I decided that if i was really going to do this and live the best life i can and be here to see my grandchildren grow than I needed to work on myself. so I decided that if i am going to stay on my journey I need to find my path to take. So I was always into crystals and tarot so i started there and stumbled into witchcraft and wicca. And as i started reading into it I started realizing this what i need. Nature, light, hope healing. So here I am ready to figure out what is next for me. And how I can grow not only in my craft but as a person. A person that maybe one day will do good and help this world. So any guidance or advice will be grateful. Sorry for the long post sometimes I get writing and just keep writing. LOL!!! Blessed Be
@jackie3 Hello and welcome I’m Tracy from England. I hope you find the healing and fresh start you need. This is a lovely coven, and many here will have shared your experiences, I’m sure they’ll be able to offer advice. 
Welcome @jackie3 
It sounds like you have had quite the journey- congrats to you on your road to freedom and for taking back control of your life!
There are many resources here when it comes to healing and working with light and positive energies. Please feel free to explore around- if you ever need any help finding things or find yourself with questions, please don’t hesitate to reach out. The Coven here is a very friendly one! 
Make yourself at home, Jackie- blessed be! 
Hello 
and welcome home 
@jackie3
I’m so glad your path led you here, Jackie, I’m Marsha, an Eclectic Solitary Witch, from Colorado.
Your words are profound! You are a very wise woman. The hardest lessons always seem to teach us the most. We are here for you, Jackie, welcome to the family! 
With love and magick 
always
@jackie3 welcome to the forum! I can relate to everything you said about addiction I’ve been there to I’m ten years clean only because I’m in the methadone clinic but it’s still a fight so trust me I understand. I’m so glad you found your way to us this has been really good for my mental health and I know it will be good for yours too everyone here is a family so don’t be afraid to ask questions we also have incredible moderators to help guide you. Your entry spoke to my heart and You’ve definitely come to the right place. 
Thank you and I am on the methadone clinic too. I never know how people will react to me saying that i am on the methadone program. Some people will basically tell you your not clean, or your just taking legal drugs. And honestly methadone helped save my life. I have tried many many times to get clean, and different ways including methadone in the past. I just finally was ready to take my life back. Its true you wont get clean unless you truly want to. But it kinda gets to me when people say stuff like that. I feel like they are minimizing all the things that i have accomplished, telling me that i am in active addiction, and worse things cause i am on methadone. And it use to put doubt in my head, discourage me into moving on to the next step in my life. So thank you for having the courage to share that with me and the community. It tells me that I made the right decision joining this community. That people are accepting and openminded. Also it helps to know that we might have different stories about how and when we walked in the pit of hell but the ending is the same that we found our own heaven and light. Thank you again for sharing and CONGRATS on the 10 YEARS!!! And any advice or guidance that ever pops into your head will be much appreciated and taken seriously. Sorry for the long reply I talk too much and now obviously write too much!!!
Hi, @jackie3! I’m Amethyst from Southern West Virginia. Welcome to the forum!
You have my admiration for being 5 years clean, that’s a tough road to go down. Here’s to 5 more and 5 more after that!
This is a great place for community and acceptance and I hope that’s what you find. I hope that magic and nature open up a whole new world to you, one that will help you get through the dark days.
If you have any problems or anything, just holler and someone will be there to help you. I look forward to chatting with you more!
Welcome to the forum @jackie3! 
I’m Susurrus, another moderator here at Spells8. I’m currently on my way back from a kind of leave of absence. 
I hope you enjoy your time here & there really is so much to learn about… just about everything. Everyone here is very friendly & supportive. So feel free to jump in on any open topic or share sometbing with us
I look forward to speaking with you throughout the forum!
Merry meet!
I’m Kat and am currently located in North Carolina. I found the practice over 20 years ago but lost my way for a while. I found my way home a couple of years ago and shortly thereafter found this amazing group of people!! I am a fairly eclectic Green witch with a deep interest in tarot, runes, herbalism, and moon magic. My deities are Artemis (she’s been with me since the beginning) and The Morrigan, a recent guide in my life.
Thank you for your bravery in sharing your story. I admire your perseverance and hard work. Magick had definitely changed my perspective and outlook on life and the world and I’m better for it. I hope it will be the same for you!
So glad to have you here!
Hello @jackie3 and welcome to the forum!
My name is Megan and I’m one of the moderators here at Spells8 
It’s nice to meet you!
Woohoo! 
That deserves a celebration, for sure! You’ll find no judgment here. We’re all here to support one another, and being in recovery for five years is an amazing accomplishment. No matter how you get there, you’re showing your strength and bravery every day you choose recovery. 
I’m proud of you!
Please, feel free to make yourself at home here - let us know if you have any questions or need assistance!
Hi I wanted to thank everybody for giving me such a warm welcome. Its been awhile since I have been part of something constructive so if i dont respond correctly or something please know that i really appreciate and hear what everybody says. Now what that said any ideas on where i should start. I am preemie witch. So i was looking at the few courses is there anything i should take first or do something totally different. I usually jump in head first then overwhelm myself. And i know this is more than a hobby its a way of life and you never stop learning. And people have told me that there is no wrong way. But want to know what I should do first. Thank you again
Wicca Self-Initiation: Video Course in 8 Ritual Nights – Spells8 I would start with these first
Blessed be, dear!!!
You came to the right Coven, people here are wonderful.
I am Eva 
, a newbie here as well. If you need anything- feel free to message any of us. You must be going through a lot. We can all help, even with just a healing word.
For now I would like to lift your mood by saying
You are also a star 
.
@crystal59 suggestion is great. I’d like to add to help set up a daily spiritual practice, if you click on menu on the main page of the app, then daily ritual, it’s got some lovely short rituals with accompanying videos that you can do, not too long either. And to end you can do the Lunar ritual before bed. Nothing long or fancy but very nice. Have fun. Enjoy the journey, there’s no hurry. The craft to me is a roadtrip, the view on the road is more interesting than the destination. 