Not sure which direction to take

Hi All -

I am seeking clarity and insight on which direction I should take regarding my career situation.

I was off work for a few months last year due to mental health (and me actually listening to my body and mind and taking the time I needed :pray: :heart_hands: :person_in_lotus_position: thank you Self!!!), then was laid off as I was returning to work. I was kind of bummed about it, I really liked the company I was working for and got to work with people all over the world. But we had been acquired by a larger company and we knew there was a strong possibility that not all of us would continue on with them. That’s business. And, as usual, it ended up being a blessing in disguise, as most of those who did continue on with the new company have not been happy in their new roles and the volume of work.

I started looking for another job pretty much right away at that point, since it had been like 3 months since I had worked. I did a little magick :wink: and amazing job offers were pouring in, quite literally overwhelming me to the point I was returning to an unhealthy anxious state. So against my practical (maybe mundane is a better word here) sense saying “you have to work every day, what are you doing?! go get a job!,” I listened to my intuition and continued to rest until it felt right. Thank goodness for savings accounts!

In January, an opportunity came to me that seemed/seems to fit pretty well with me. I have have been doing the books for a home builder three days a week (job advertised/promoted as 2-3 days per week and hybrid). It’s a small office, there’s like 4 of us, and I’m the oldest one! LMAO, that was a first for me! They hired me because they said the former accountant was not able to give them that much time, as he had other clients he worked for as well.

So I dive in, pick up everything pretty well I feel. It’s only been two months and I have cleaned EVERY thing up that needed to be, reconciled every project to the penny, and got them all caught up on paying their vendors. Mind you, all while going into the office for 3 days each week, and putting in well over 10 hour days… on salary. But I was happy to do it to get them to a good place, which only makes it better for me as well.

Last week and the week before that, I had a bit of a backslide with the anxiety. I stay pretty private and surface level at work and told them I had some health issues that needed to be dealt with and that I needed to work from home last week and the week before. I wasn’t always able to be “on the clock” for a structured 8-5 kind of schedule, but kept in consistent contact with them about what I was getting done, when I was working, etc. And they could see that, because what I work on goes directly to the owner so he sees I’m working and that things are now all clean.

At the end of last week, he said that he did not feel like it should be taking me this long to get the stuff done, even after telling him a few times (me proactively going to him and saying “hey I know this is taking a little bit but I’m getting this and this and this done and clean”).

Now I see why the previous accountant didn’t do things so cleanly. He was probably told the same. If you only want to pay for 2-3 days a week, that’s how much work you’re going to get.

So he decided to see how it goes if his tax accountant does the next few weeks of financials. Of course it’s going to go much faster, I just cleaned everything up… and while I was struggling. I was pretty proud of myself to be quite honest. And it (not sure the word I’m looking for here, but close to…) offended/hurt me that he wanted to see if it could be done faster after I just put in all the work. He said they are happy to have me return in a week or two, given the outcome.

Like I said, of course it’s going to go much smoother for this guy because I got it all together for him, and he doesn’t know what it was like before so he can’t even vouch for me regarding the time I put in. I tried to explain this but I’m not sure he really “heard” me. Although I do feel they will probably ask me back.

What I am struggling to feel clarity on is if they do ask me to return, should I? Is this the right position for me? The days/hours/hybrid situation (and even the people, still) are great for me, granted they stick to that. Or should I thank them for their time and move on? I still have opportunities flowing in so I’m not worried about that. I just want to be happy.

Sorry for the long post. Any insight or suggestions for meditations, divinations, etc are greatly appreciated. I’m just not feeling I’ve gotten a direction on it yet. Thank you!

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I’ve had a similar experience where I had 20 hour/week job, but I really wanted to do well, so I put in extra hours. It never really works out well, though, does it? Salaried part-time positions are for a set number of hours, unlike salaried full-time jobs where you work the number of hours required to get the job done. When you work over those hours, It sets up an expectation that can’t be met over time. Think of it is as a boundary issue. I find employers just don’t hear explanations because they are typically focused on results they can depend on. When those results fall off, they are confused.

Especially in a very small office, employers want you there at an expected time and leave at the expected time. Unless it is a work at home job, small business owners would expect you to work in the office less you have a contagious illness and that you won’t work at home while ill. They would also expect a doctor’s note for a week’s absence. Otherwise, everyone would want to work at home, too.

Jobs are cut and dried :slight_smile: If they are not paying you, they have no expectation that you will let them know you are looking at other jobs. There is no need to thank them for their time; just apply for the jobs you like as if you had been let go. You do not have to list this job on your resume if it was less than 6 months or put them as a reference.

If they ask you back, you have to consider that it didn’t work so well the first time. It sounds like you need a job where you can either work at home or that has lower demands on your energy so you can work as scheduled. Check out some of these accommodations to understand the ways your anxiety may impact you in the workplace. Small employers wouldn’t be offering you these accommodations, this is just for your personal knowledge, so you know what you personally need to accommodate for. For example, my substitute teaching job allows me lots of scheduling flexibilty; although I will not get paid for days I don’t come to work, if I need a mental health day, I can take it at any time without worrying about losing my job.

You could also look into getting a job coach (through your city or county) who can help you develop strategies for managing anxiety in the workplace. Mine was terrific!

If you need to work from home, you could pick a job where you work from home all the time or look at jobs that have lower demands on your energy so you can easily show up as expected. You might do better in a job where you work only 4 hours a day, for example. The jobs like this may pay less but what matters is that you will be meeting expectations and getting a good reference you can use for the next job.

If your mental health is keeping you from working and earning steady income for months at a time and you have a doctor who can document that, you could also apply for SSDI. You can still work part-time (and sometimes, full-time) while receiving disability benefits.

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Sounds like a tricky situation, @ValentineMoonBabe- I feel for you, my friend! :people_hugging: :heart:

It looks like it can go two ways from here- should things go downhill and the company lets you go (which sucks- for them! Sounds to me like you are a very thoughtful and diligent worker) then the path forward will be clear for you :railway_track:

However, if things go as you are expecting and they do invite you back- then you’ve got a choice on your hands. But while having a choice can sometimes feel like a curse, it does mean that the power is in your hands. Which is both intimidating and freeing at the same time- I like to think that, when we have choices, it means that the Universe or higher powers trust you and your judgement to make the make decision you can :blush:

I don’t know enough about the situation to feel confident giving you advice one way or another- but it is worrisome that your boss doesn’t understand (or seem to care) about how much work you’ve put in, way over what was agreed. However, you love the job itself and the situation- so are those things working sticking around? That’s a big decision that will require some meditative assessing and journalling to work out, if you ask me :open_book: :person_in_lotus_position:

For spellwork, I’ve got a few suggestions that might help:

If you do decide you want to keep the job, as you await their notification you could cast the Moondrop Blessing Spell to Keep and Protect Your Job.
Spell-to-Protect-your-Job-Moon-Water-360x240

If you decide it’s time to move on to something better, there’s this Easy Door Opener New Job Spell
Wiccan-Spell-For-Getting-A-Job-360x240

(There’s actually an entire Collection of Job Spells on Spells8- feel free to browse through them for more options!)

When it comes to making a decision, I recommend that, in addition to meditating on the outcome and journalling your thoughts, you could try the Pros and Cons Tarot Spread
Pros-and-Cons-Tarot-Spread-360x240


Whatever happens and whatever you decide to do, I am sure it will be the right decision, Kelly! I’m sending you positive energy and I’m cheering for you :heart::blush:

Good luck and blessed be! :sparkles:

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Thank you for the great info. I think I need to pursue the SSDI route and working part time. I know my doc will be happy to help.

Also, thanks for the link in jobs with lower demands. I love accounting but it’s not all I love lol. You’re right, my mental health is much more important (than just about anything). And great idea on the assistance from city or county, I didn’t know about that.

Really appreciate your insight.

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Love the way you put this, thanks.

I am going to try the tarot spread suggested to help with my meditation and decision, given that I get to make it.

Appreciate the spells suggested as well. I’ve used the Road Opener a few times for different reasons and it always helps.
I forgot about the one to keep and protect a job so thanks. The job spell collection is really great here.

Thank you

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Personally when at a crossroad i consult hekate as shes got sway over crossroads I normally incoke her and ask her to shine her tourches and guide me the right way.

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Ah yes, thank you for that. I will do so!

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You’re very welcome, @ValentineMoonBabe- I’m happy if the suggestions helped :blush:

Good luck with the tarot spread and any spellwork you choose to do, I’m cheering for you, Kelly! :heart:

Good luck and blessed be! :sparkles:

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A post was merged into an existing topic: Weekly witchy CHALLENGE – Light ‘EM UP’ (Challenge entry) Garnet

No problem. I have received disability for a few years. I got approved the first time but it took 11 months after I submitted my application to receive payments. I can still work part-time usually – but I have had to take time, off, too, and it’s nice to know I can still pay my rent and get by. It has minimized that stress to the point where I’ve gotten so much better :slight_smile: I read this blog called “How To Get On.” It was really invaluable to me. It’s not what you say to SSA (because everything is true) but how you say it, how you document it and how you align it the SSA Blue Book criteria, I believe (that is a part of their website that outlines their decision criteria for each type of disability). The whole process actually helped me get in touch and reconcile a lot about myself and my family history (but I am so glad it’s over!) I learned that in healthcare, many women tend to underplay or underestimate the impact of their disability or health issue (because they are so busy taking care of others) and that can work against them in the application process but on the other hand, it’s not much fun explaining that part of your life to strangers :slight_smile: That is where the blog helped me.

I am glad it was helpful and I’m kind of glad to have a chance to share it. Being in the system of receiving help – I’ve learned a lot. Until a few years ago, I spent my life trying to conceal and fake that part of me or feeling guilty about it or not understanding why things were so hard. When I came to accept that I needed a little help, wow, I got so much better :slight_smile:

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