Challenge entry #2
For my second entry, I’ve chosen 
From the Shadows.
We are approaching the next new moon, so I thought I would take this as an opportunity to finally tackle this challenge. And I’m going to sprinkle through some DALL·E generated images so this isn’t just a wall of rambling text. 
I do a lot of shadow work through journalling and even sometimes by conversing in this forum. Sometimes, the vulnerabilities just flow through me into my writing, and I press “reply,” opening myself up to others pointing out things that I hadn’t noticed before or giving me ideas for how to proceed when I hadn’t even considered improving in such an area.
Anyway, let’s delve into a few things that I’ve had to deal with…
(This is meant to be me, but it added glasses, tattoos, and shoes, and made the PC tower way too big.
)
Firstly, my fears used to include being seen as crazy by the people who matter to me. It has caused me to start some arguments over a perceived implication of being crazy sometimes. But I’ve become a lot better with that, especially over the course of this year, as I’ve been doing a lot of shadow work.
Secondly, the grudges I hold against others that I could let go of are few. It’s hard for me to hold grudges at all, even after horrible things have happened. It seems like my natural inclination is to let go, and I’ve actually had to fight myself not to let go sometimes. Why would I do such a thing? Because it makes me drop my guard and get hurt by the same people over and over again.
(That being said, my idea of forgiving means giving trust back to the person who has wronged me. It’s got nothing to do with stewing in angry feelings and making myself miserable — I think that’s something else entirely, which I fortunately have not had much trouble with.)
However, I’ve left many unhealthy relationships behind now, so issues with this reoccurring are much lower than they would have been in the past. The remaining family members on my father’s side are a bit of an issue, especially my father. While he seems to be mellowing out a little, he has betrayed me too recently for me to let my guard down.
(Again, me in my favourite style to wear through winter.
)
Anyway, as these kinds of things keep naturally appearing during the process of my journalling and talking here, I will switch my focus a little.
I posted not too long ago about the struggle of life and how it’s neverending. I worry that sometimes I come across as immune to emotional setbacks, but in reality, this is not the case. I have bad days and moments just like anyone else; I just have become a lot better than I used to be at letting them go.
However, spending some time in the low moments can actually be relaxing or get me thinking constructively, and I come out the other side with new insights. I believe there are beneficial sides to it at times, so I don’t strive to eradicate low moments from my life entirely.
That being said, staying in those lows would be harmful if it made me look for ways to escape, avoid dealing with things, or cope through superficially fulfilling activities such as online shopping. It sounds fine in the moment, but those actions cause a metaphorical debt I would have to repay with interest in the future, as things left unresolved often grow into bigger things.
(Me again, reading while sitting on the sofa. Something I enjoy doing.)
Anyway, one last thing for this challenge and that’s a spell, of course!
Filling the Void
This spell intends to catch positive energies and fill the gap left after releasing old habits and relationships in the process of shadow work. It calls upon love, prosperity (not just financially), spiritual energy, and good health.
You will need: A glass jar with a tight lid, special items (a coin to symbolise money, heart charm or rose petals to symbolise love, ginger root for health, and quartz crystal for spirituality), some honey or syrup, and a yellow chime candle.
First, we set these up on our altars. The empty jar stands for potential and space for a new beginning. We are to hold it and get to feel the emptiness in it, translating readiness for positive changes.
We then take our items and empower them individually. For example, we can take the coin and picture our financial stability filling the coin up with green light, before depositing it into the jar. We then do the same with love, imagining a pink light when we deposit the items. Health will have an orange light, and spiritual energy will have a white light.
After empowering all of our items, we can pour honey over the items in the jar to bring and hold our desired energies. Then we seal the jar, fixing the candle with melted wax and burning it fully.
We complete this spell by ensuring that the jar is placed in an open place where it can be seen. Here, it will serve as a constant reminder of the positive change we want to draw into our lives.
Before I leave this challenge entry here, I have to give a shout-out to some lovely witches who help keep me grounded in this space: @Satans_Helper, @Artemisia, and @CelestiaMoon. I’m grateful for being able to come to you with my worries, especially since this online socialising life is relatively new to me, and I’m still finding my way around it. (I’m an autistic hermit, even online. )