Cord Cutting From Toxic Family Members

Toxic family members can be a real drain on your energy and your life. If you have someone in your family who is constantly negative, critical, or just plain unpleasant to be around, it can be tough to keep up your own positive attitude and avoid getting bogged down in their toxicity.

One way to protect yourself from these toxic family members is to use a ritual to cut the energetic cords that connect you to them.

This spell will help you to release the negativity and toxicity of these family members so that you can live your own life more fully and happily.

To perform this spell, you will need:

  • 1 black candle

  • 1 white candle

  • 1 piece of black tourmaline

  • 1 piece of rose quartz

  • String

  • 1 tablespoon of olive oil

  • 1 bowl of water

  • 1 piece of paper

  • 1 pen

Begin this spell by casting a circle around you - hold straight out in front of you with your power hand an incense stick that is lit. Walk clock-wish in a circle and repeat:

“I cast the circle round and round, from earth to sky, from sky to ground. I conjure now this sacred space, outside time and outside space. The circle has been formed, and I am now safe between realms.”

Write the name of the toxic family member on the piece of paper. Then, roll up the paper away from you and tie it around the black tourmaline with a piece of string.

Next, anoint the black candle with the olive oil and light it. Hold the black tourmaline in your non-dominant hand and visualize all of the negativity and toxicity being drained out of you and into the stone.

As you do this, say aloud:

“I release you from my life. I release you from my heart. I release you from my mind. I am free from your toxicity.”

Repeat this three times. Then, blow out the candle.

Next, anoint the white candle with the olive oil and light it. Hold the rose quartz in your non-dominant hand and visualize all of the love and light flowing into you from the universe.

As you do this, say aloud:

“I am surrounded by love. I am surrounded by light. I am protected from negativity.”

Repeat this three times. Then, blow out the candle.

Finally, take the black tourmaline and submerge it in the bowl of water. Leave it there overnight. In the morning, throw the water out and bury the stone in the ground.

As you do this spell, visualize the cords that connect you to the toxic family member being cut.

Feel the weight being lifted off of your shoulders as you release yourself from their negative influence.

You can do this with anything you feel does not serve you well - you can even do this cord cutting for a bad habit. Instead of writing a name on the piece of paper write the bad habit or the thing you wish to be released from.


Your timing is amazing, thankyou for this :sparkling_heart:


This is really good.

I do have a question about cord cutting.

So even if the person in your family is toxic, can you still do a cord cutting without removing love?
Or does doing not including the tie of love keep the cord cutting from working for everything else?

I have toxic family members but even though they are toxic with their negativity, they are still my family members and I still love them.

Does this make sense?


Very nice @SilverBear One small question. Whats the thinking on holding the black tourmaline in the non-dominant hand? I only ask as I tend to think of the dominant hand as the projective and non-dominant as receptive so if I wanted to send negativity to the black , it would be in the dominant hand. Just wondering your thoughts, thanks! :thinking:


What a cord cutting is – is simply cutting the energetic connection that is transmitting “bad” energy. You can even cut a positive, but overly needy cord. For example, you may have a wonderful friendship or relationship with someone, but are aware that you rely on this person far too much – maybe you are overly needy or they are overly needy. By disconnecting that particular cord you can bring the relationships back to healthier levels! :upside_down_face:

My “recipes” and spells are a mere guide…but my thinking – and how I visualize this particular spell is – while visualizing all the negativity being drained, I hold my power hand flat to the earth to keep me grounded. While visualizing love and light flowing - I hold my power hand up to the sky and allow the light to flow through me in this way.

Do what feels right to you. :slight_smile:


Thank you! Going to try this one out :thread: :scissors:


Thank you @SilverBear , this makes way more sense now!