It’s my pleasure, Alexxis! 
I’m sorry to hear about your loss and I hope that with time you’ll be able to recover/find all the books you are hoping for 
One thought is that there’s a collection of free online books shared in the book club (which you are warmly invited to join if it interests you!) and I recently started using my library card to access digital books through the library. I was surprised to find they have many of Llewellyn’s books like the ones about the Sabbats and various areas of magick! Perhaps you could check to see if your library has a similar program for some additional witchy books to read? 
It’s always a pleasure to meet a fellow Eclectic! 
And I understand your feelings about being in a Coven. While it’s certainly not for everyone, I’ve found that the online Coven is the perfect balance between freedom to do and practice as a please with the camaraderie of people who “get” what I do. And it helps that everyone here is super friendly and kind!
Wherever your path leads you going forward, know that you are welcome here!
Much love and many blessings! 