As for keeping a soft gaze. I removed my glasses and just relax my focus, the more relaxed you are, you can blink as normal, and you’ll still have a soft gaze, just look at the ball or mirror slightly off from the target spot. Like if it’s the centre of the ball, look slightly to the left or right of the centre. You may see multiple balls, a blur, shapes but gradually your intuition will kick in and it’ll make sense. I find a low light, evening and candles help soften the atmosphere and make it easier.
To soften your eyes try staring at a wall first and look in your preferal vision and the wall at the same time…
Or take yout hands to your sides bring your hands up so they are barely in your peripheral vision look at want is in front of you and your hqnds at same time… this is how to learn to soften your eyes… it is called owl eyes. My ancestortral medicine teacher taught me it