What a fun challenge!
My grandmother and my mom and my sister and I have always had a very strong intuition/psychic thing going on. We all know who is calling when the phone rings, get those gut feelings that something bad is going to happen, and just know when things are going to go down (I called my college roommate to ask her if she was in labor and she had just checked in to labor and delivery). I also got my way a lot. Like, if I really wanted something, I made it happen. Even crazy outlandish thingsā¦ I just sort of set my mind to it and made it happen. I have always been in love with rocks and crystals and the moon. My mom made growing up magicalā¦ fairies and dragons and fairy talesā¦ it was awesome.
I grew up knowing that there was magic in the worldā¦ but somehow I wasnāt exactly connected to it. I grew up in the Bible Belt. I was raised Catholic and married into an Episcpal family. I was never unhappy with my faith until rather recently. It just didnāt feel complete anymore.
There were several catalysts that got me to where I am today (I think). We started homeschooling our kids due to Dyslexia. I started reading all about nature study and slowly got absorbed into Waldorf education. Waldorf really has nothing to do with the Craft, but there is a heavy emphasis on the wheel of the year and acknowledging the seasons and festivals. I fell in love with that. Waldorf for young kids also encourages explaining the world to young children with fairy tales and by teaching them that the world is magical. King Winter brings the winter and Mother Earth has her Root Babies that awake in the springā¦ fairies and gnomes are always about. Itās magical. My mom had no idea what Waldorf was when I was a child, but I feel like I lived this childhood.
Simultaneously, my kids started attending forest school once a week and went to camp for several summers there too. The camp they go to touts ācreative rewildingā and encourages reconnection to the land through ancestral skills (tracking, medicinal plants, crafting with natural materials, storytelling, etc). The kids learn all these skills through participating in a live action role play with fantastic beasts and gnomes and fairies and trolls and talking ravens, etc. It is absolutely magical and the people who run it are amazing in every sense of the word.
Our whole family has reconnected with nature and I started really paying attention to the wheel of the year.
One of the biggest things that I did was a Waldorf/wheel of the year inspired tradition that takes place during Advent each year (raised Catholicā¦ canāt let that go!). During Advent, you light a candle each night until Christmasā¦ the candles are arranged in a spiral and each week, you add a different element to the spiral. Week 1 is rocks, stones, and bones, week 2 is plants and seeds, week 3 is animals, and week 4 is the realm of man (this is the super simplified version). The whole tradition is steeped with song and stories that weave the natural world and the Christian realm together (my favorite story is about the trolls who wonder why their crystals have grown dull and journey into the world where they find the Christ child and the light surrounding his birth brightens their crystals again). Iāve done this with my family for the last two years and it just makes me feel soā¦. Connected? itās amazing to watch the light brighten from one dim candle to a blazing spiral by solstice (and a few days after to Christmas Eve). It is my very favorite thing because of the feeling it gives me. I donāt have words to really describe it. Magical.
In April, a good friend of mine emailed me and asked me if she could ask me a question about being a witch. I was likeā¦ uhā¦ what? Iām not a witch. She was mortified and said that because I always had an oil or herbal remedy at hand that she had just assumedā¦. I calmed her downā¦. And later that night i thoughtā¦ what if I am a witch? What does being a witch reallly look like?
A few internet searched later and I found Spells8. A few lessons later and I started to panic. I couldnāt be a Christian and a witch, could I? That was a whole different rabbit hole. I decided I was going to take the courses on Spells8 and keep reading because knowledge is power and understanding a multitude of religions, faiths, and beliefs is important. (I have always kind of had a hodgepodge of beliefs myself, even as a Christian). I read St. Claiirās book āMy Journey as a Christian Witchā and finally decided I could do both and was fairly certain I wasnāt going to hell.
I called the bestie and told her āI think I might be a witch.ā She laughed and laughed and replied, āReally? How long did it take you to figure that out? Weāve always known you were a witch.ā Thanks for letting me know, right?
I told my mom. I got the same response. Itās been nice, though, to talk things through with my mom and explore together.
So here I am now, 3 months in. It does not feel like only 3 months. It feels like a lifetime. I feel so confident in my abilities, I know I can manifest, I understand the connection between crystals, herbs, oils, the moon, prayer, intention, spells and how they relate to me.
I feel complete. I am happy. I still have so much to learn and that is exciting to me!
I am so thankful for everyone here who has cheered me on, patiently answered questions, reminded me that I donāt have to choose between a religion and the craft, shared their knowledge with meā¦. You people really are some of my favorites on the planet. I havenāt met you, I couldnāt pick you out on the street corner if I passed you, but you are my coven now and I am so happy for that! Cheers!
From approximately November 2021 to May 2022 was a difficult time for many reasons, and Iām not sure how I would have made it through without themā¦and of course, the support of the Infinte Roots coven! 