This is well-said, @Mistress_Of_Herbs, and I agree! 
I see magick as an inherently neutral force- like a sword that could be use to kill or to defend, or a pen that can write healing or hurting words. Where magick falls on the alignment is all in the intention of the caster.
Anytime a spell changes or directs anotherās actions (aka crossing into someoneās personal freedom and potentially taking away their freedom) I donāt consider it to be āwholesomeā magick anymore- itās crossing ethical lines.
Some (not all!) interpret the Wiccan Rede to mean that Wiccans (and any witches who follow the Rede or a version of it) are forbidden from casting spells that manipulate others (source). Thereās a great discussion about it in The Ethics of Consent Before Casting.
However, sometimes we cast spells on others as an act of personal safety or defense- like Banishing Spells or Freezer Spells. These are spells that influence others (likely against their will), however, they are done as an act of self-defense.
Some would say that these spells that influence others are automatically Baneful, but for me, this is spellwork that, although it may not be āpureā in ethical terms, it is cast with a pure intention (defense, protection). It canāt be āWhite Magickā as I define White Magick, but itās also not āBlack/Baneful Magickā. Hence: the middle ground: Grey Magick.
(As for your question about love spells- yes! Most love spells, with the exception of self-love/care spells, go right into the Grey Magick category too)
This is why I called it Grey Magick, but thatās just me- at the end of the day, every witch is free to define their own magickal ethics and practice in whatever way feels right to them! 
Blessed be 