l would love to hear your thoughts about the concept of obtalnlng consent before castlng a kindly meant spell on behalf of someone else (basically, healing, justice or protection spells).
Some of the spells I cast before l really ‘got’ the concept of consent were protectlon spells for my loved ones, lncluding my child, especially during the height of the pandemic. I also cast a healing spell for “everyone” then.
But I am readng that it’s not the best way to do things. When I think about it, I can see how it’s more respectful to ask first. But not all my loved ones know or are on board with this practice.
How have you handled consent? Is it legit to do beneficial spells for others? Or is it wiser to just focus on yourself? Any guidance or ideas about this?
A college professor of mine had ask for help in earning money a few days ago (he’s about to be a father again, so congratulations to him and his wife), I told him and some other college student of the IT course about having a different faith from theirs. The professor is a respectful one and gave out consent to what I would do for his behalf
When telling the truth that you’re of a different practice from the main stream faiths and practice, do it in a respectful, kind and open minded approach, the ones of different beliefs are less likely to end up in defensive mode. Sometimes it’s better to ask for consent and other times it would be safer to do it by subtle means or doing it in secret if it’s the only way for the practitioner to be safe (this is from the experience I have so it may be biased, the others may be able to help you more)
Personally, I mainly do spells for myself and for the coven here, healing spells for people I know. I get consent because I figure if they wouldn’t like it, their energies would fight off mine and it won’t work. Permission is important to me. But that’s just my two cents worth.
Well for me I do a prayer/blessing a few times a day where I ask for protection for family and friends but I am not sure if that counts. As for a specific spell for a specific person I wouldn’t do it without their permission, I think by doing so you might interfere with their own free will and I wouldn’t want to do that.
I think it depends on who asks. I prefer not to encourage a beginner to cast a spell on another person, mainly because they should focus first on casting spells on themselves, as Amethyst and Saulamay mentioned, until they know what they’re doing.
However the topic of consent is one of the most philosophical subjects in the Craft (in my opinion) since it deals with the concept of free will.
If you remember the Wiccan Rede “An ye harm none, do what ye will”, you could argue that it’s okay to cast spells on others as long as you’re not causing them harm. So it is up to you. Which matters most to you? Helping someone even when they don’t want help or failing to help a friend when you could have? That’s a question that only you can answer.
Really great question, @mary25! Thanks for bringing it up
While I’ve spent a lot of thought about how I perceive Black/Dark Magick in my own personal practice, I haven’t laid clear lines on beneficial casting for others. Like @Amethyst, most of the spellwork I do is on/for myself. The one big exception to this is for the coven’s Energy Exchange Circle (where healing/positive energies are shared at the request of a coven member).
When I think about it, I don’t think I would feel the need to ask for consent before casting helpful or protective magick on a close friend or family member. After all, I wouldn’t feel the need to ask them before helping to do the dishes/laundry/other helpful tasks. We’re close enough that I would just jump in and lend a hand where I thought it was needed- so why not with magick too?
As for casting on strangers/people I’m not close with… like others have said, it would be a case-by-case basis depending on the situation. While it’s hard to see any downsides to casting loving and positive magick, if someone found out you casted on them without their permission I can understand how that might be seen as invasive.
I guess TLDR: listen to your heart and do what feels right to you
This question is a great thing for every witch to consider how they would handle- thanks again for bringing it up, Mary!
I agree with everyone else. When you’re a more seasoned witch, there’s also the part (in energy/ work/crystal healing) of if that if the person is not capable of saying yes or no.
Then you have to make a choice if it’s for the better good. Like if the person is unconscious, in a coma, etc.
You’ll get there!!! Keep practicing and doing the weekly challenges, they help!!!
It definitely depends. My ideas surrounding consent in practice have changed over the course of the last few years as I’ve grown closer in my faith. I used to believe as others have stated that as long as it wasn’t hurting anyone, I would be fine to cast spells on/for others without their knowledge. Obviously if I was doing baneful magick I wouldn’t ask…
Hey there, you hurt me and now I’m going to put a curse on you.Is that okay?
Now, though, what I would do instead is either get permission beforehand or work that permission into my spellwork. There are some deities out there who would rather their devotees go through the difficult time because it’s part of their lesson, learning process, or Work. If I were to do a spell for this person to get them out of that situation, I would be harming their Work and possibly pissing off a deity.
What I do instead is I work it into my spell by including parameters for the spell to fail if necessary. This would look like saying the spell won’t be effective if [person’s] God(s) don’t will it, or the spell won’t be effective if the [person’s] energy is not in alignment with the spell. This way it leaves it open for the energy I put out to interpret the situation better than I can from afar and without seeing the big picture.
I also see blessings as something kinda iffy now. I am a person who does not want anymore children ever and if someone I know works with a fertility-based deity who is all about pregnancy and childbearing? Yeah, don’t bless me please. Not everyone is going to want the blessings of specific Gods or Gods in general
It’s a lot to think about, for sure, and I think it’s great that you brought up this topic!
I find it ironic as a teenager, a minor back then 3 -4 years ago and I told myself I would likely never end up bearing a child, I may still do that in the present self, I actually only intend to adopt or find myself a successor for whatever I may teach or leave behind in the next generation, other than that nothing else, I know Babaylans are free to marry, it’s just maybe it’s not time or even part of my destiny for me to fall in love and bear a child if that is the will of the highest deity in ancient Filipino beliefs who is called as either Abba or Bathala (different deities from the Christian one). Other than that I’m free to do as I wish within reason in the practice
While in the moment I would agree that doing a spell that is helpful may not seem like it is a big deal to do without another’s consent, because we are doing it for a good purpose, but I like to play things ahead to see possible outcomes. So let’s say I do a luck spell for someone without them knowing and the following week out of the blue they win a trip, that’s great for them right? But say while they are on this trip they fall and break a leg, not so lucky. Had they not won this trip the broken leg may never have occurred. Do I hold myself responsible for this action since my spell may have been the reason they went on the trip? Did I impose on their free will?
It is possible I am over thinking it but I tend to do that in many situations so apologies if I am looking at this differently than others.
You shouldn’t apologize for having a different perspective in this discussion! Perspectives are important and are how we grow and define ourselves and see our truths.
That’s a good point. I had not thought of that. Sometimes what seems like a negative situation turns out to be a good thing in the long run. And sometimes, adversity makes us stronger or helps us grow. I will keep thinking about this. Thanks for your thoughts!
Personally I cast (Protection and healing) where I would. If it keeps them safe they don’t have to feel contaminated by my "Wicked ways. ". My family is less than enamored with my faith. But, there is no harm done and therefore karmic whiplash. I do ask permission if I feel the need to ask pregnant ladies if I could bless the unborn child. The unborn blessing is much more personal and I always ask the mother if I may bless her baby by touch. With her consent I touch her stomach and with the child under my hand I say:
Blessed be, blessed be
Keep this child safe for me.
Make him strong, to do no wrong.
Bless him with health
& maybe some wealth
For he is the future we pray for.
Blessed be, blessed be.
As I have spoken, so let it be.
The issue of male/female is up to you if she doesn’t know the sex.
This was a wonderful topic, thank you.
