Ancestry and Modern Collide 👣 My Magickal Roots

Note: Some possibly triggering content, all hidden and blurred.

I want to start this challenge post off like so many others have done and talk about what brought me to magick and my pagan path.


Image via Unsplash

I grew up in a semi-religious household. I say semi-religious because while we went to church occasionally, it was never a routine part of our week or something that we were really forced to do. My paternal grandparents were LDS Mormons and my maternal grandparents are some type of non-denominational Christian. I say non-denominational because while they believe in the word of the Bible and uphold some of those rules, they do not go to church nor are they active in any Christian community.

Anyway, to keep that story from getting extremely long, I did not have a religious upbringing. I was brought up with the concepts and ideas from Christianity without the indoctrination of the faith. When I first discovered Wicca, I was about 12 years old and I was very, very, lost with myself.

If you have interacted with me outside of Spells8 on my channel and content, you will know that I am a big advocate for mental health in spiritual spaces. This stems back to my early childhood and the reason I was so lost.

Possibly Triggering Story Hidden Here

Around the age of 12 or 13, I started having what I can only describe as flashbacks. I have what is called repressed memories, or memories that my brain deemed too horrible to deal with at the time, so it pushed them back as a coping mechanism. This is kind of like amnesia, but then I started remembering them. This was all very hard for me to deal with, as these were memories of past sexual abuse and trauma, and I started down the self-destructive path of self-harm.

I don’t quite remember when I discovered Wicca, but I remember who I discovered it with. My friend and I started reading Scott Cunningham and searching the internet for Wicca and trying to learn everything we could. It gave me my sense of power back and let me feel like I had control over my life. I would spend the night at her house every weekend, burn dragon’s blood incense, and go over everything we learned. We even did a ritual in her backyard one night that, in hindsight, was very dangerous.

TW: Blood

We performed a sort of bonding ritual together next to her pool where we both pricked our fingers, dropped some blood in a glass of water, and each took a drink. Yeah, I don’t recommend this because it is highly dangerous, but we were 13, young, and dumb :woman_shrugging:

Anyway, I went back and forth from Wicca to Christianity for a few years. At one point I was heavily involved in the church youth program. Looking back, it wasn’t necessarily the faith itself that drew me in but the sense of community. We did a lot of community outreach, prayer programs, food drives, and community service. I eventually left the church because I could not reconcile my personal belief in freedom of choice with the position of the church. I feel like I made my final decision one day when they were hosting a workshop/Q&A style thing for the teen group. They were talking about homosexuality and abortion and, being the church, they were adamantly against both of these things. They presented it in a way that was appealing and almost soft, I think is the way to describe it, to this large group of young and moldable minds. I made my decision to leave the church that day and never went back.

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Image via Unsplash

I have never been heavily involved in a coven, or even lightly involved for that matter. My beliefs have always ebbed and flowed, and so has my practice. There were times when I went months without honoring a sabbat or esbat and that was okay with me. It didn’t matter because I knew I was not part of an organized religion with any dogma, I was not an initiate of any tradition with responsibilities, so I was okay with it.

Fast forward to 2019 and my beliefs started to shift. I started to question the concepts of Wicca in my belief system. I started to take notice of a presence in my life and I welcomed this other presence whom I now know to be Brigid. I always knew my path would have a Celtic feel to it but I never knew exactly how. It’s funny because if you look back at my beginning podcast episodes, I was very staunchly Wiccan. The change in my practices and beliefs happened organically over time. You can even see this in my episodes, topics, and the way I speak about my beliefs in those episodes.

Digging into my physical roots, so to speak, of my blood and ancestry is an enjoyable process for me, one that allows me to recognize the privilege I have to be able to do so. I still want to do one of those DNA test things to see my ancestry, but for now, I have a little image of my mom’s test. Obviously, hers is going to be different than mine because, well, this is her and her parents and doesn’t account for my dad’s side of the family.

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We are very much European people :rofl: but that’s okay. As you all may know already, I am a Celtic pagan with an Irish focus. You can see I probably have a little bit of Irish in my, and we can trace when our Irish ancestors came to the US in the 1700s, but it isn’t much. That’s okay with me, honstly, because Ireland and Scotland have always looked like home to me. I have never been, but those are two places that I will see before I leave the physical plane.

Image via Unsplash

So I know that was long, but that’s pretty much how I got to where I am today. A lot of trial and error, a lot of trauma and things that need healing, a lot of shadows, and a lot of faith in where I’m headed. If you read this far, kudos to you and you get a cookie! :cookie: :heart: :hugs:


Continuing the discussion from :footprints: Weekly Witchy CHALLENGE - Your Magickal Roots

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This was a wonderful read @MeganB! I’m glad to know you’re here to guide us!

I find it interested how many of us got interested in the craft, fell away for one reason or other, and came back to it. Thank you so much for sharing your story!

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Do you want my address for the cookie? :upside_down_face: You are a gifted communicator and one would be a fool to not finish anything you wrote on here.

While it can be hard to share the more triggering things in our lives, I am thankful you trust us with knowledge of your past. I love how safe I feel in the coven and how I can share where I came from and how I got here. I can tell you feel the same. :blue_heart:

Beliefs are always changing, aren’t they? That is the beauty in being alive. I can see that in your story but it seems they have refined over time and they have led to the ethically minded, smart woman you are today. I am always thankful for your videos on YouTube, the content on your site, and the information you share on here. You even did a story on story day! :pray:t3: Thank you!

:star2: Blessings to you! :star2:

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@MeganB , thank you for sharing your story and as @Amethyst mentioned for you guidance and infinite wisdom…
Honor to learn from the best.
Blessed be .

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that was a great story! & I love your DNA breakdown too! It’s always so interesting to see those for each person is so different. I love the Celtic Gods & Goddesses I like to follow them and learn what I can. Right now I am & have been working with Brigid and she’s been good to me.

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Hooray for cookies! :cookie: :yum: But even more of a treat was reading this piece- it flows like a story, I love how you write, @MeganB! :blush:

This is something I hear a lot from people in religious groups of all types- sometimes it’s less about the content and more about the people you are with. There’s something powerful about being in a group :hugs: But- as you mention right after this line- sometimes this very good thing can be used for not-so-good things :sweat_smile:

Good for you for taking a step back and thinking about the situation, before making your own educated and unbiased decision to pursue a path that resonates with you. It’s an impressive thing, and much harder than it sounds! :clap:

Thanks so much for sharing your journey, Megan- may your road continue to rise up and bring you to more wonderful things in the future! :raised_hands:

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Thank you for sharing your roots with us! It doesn’t matter what your tests say because you have a beautiful heart! But yeah I can underrated the wanting to know. :sweat_smile:

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Thank you all so much for your kind words :heart:


I think that’s the nature of things @Amethyst – sometimes things fit and sometimes they don’t. I like to let my practice ebb and flow with life. As long as it doesn’t stop altogether then I’m okay.

Aww thanks @praecog29 :cookie: For now we’ll have to stick to virtual cookies (unless I can figure out how to crochet one :wink:) but I appreciate you reading everything. And you’re right, sharing some of the triggering parts are difficult, but I have never really shied away from it. I have always been of the mindset that if we don’t talk about it, no one else is going to know that they’re not alone. My best friend actually told me that me talking about my battle with postpartum depression after my daughter was born helped her see the symptoms in herself and she was able to get help faster because of it. Anyway, I’m glad you like the things I post :sparkles: And blessings to you, too! :sparkles:

I wouldn’t say I’m the best @walter :blush: but thank you! I just do what I can :smiley:

One day I’ll have my own DNA breakdown @Siofra – for now, I just use my moms lol I know mine will be vastly different because my paternal grandparents came from different parts of the world. I’m glad you’ve found solace and light with Brigid :flame:

You’re too kind @TheTravelWitch :open_book: I always enjoy hearing that people love the way I write. I’m a pantser, that’s for sure :rofl: It just seems to flow. Sometimes I read it back and edit a bit (and even reading it again I noticed a typo :rofl:) but you’re right. Community is a strong thing in most of our lives and, if we aren’t careful, we can get stuck in a community for the wrong reasons.

Aww @christina4 thank you! :heart: You have a beautiful heart as well!

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Yay!!! I got a cookie!

Kidding aside… :purple_heart:

@MeganB I am honored to have read your journey. Thank you for sharing, despite, some troubling memories that cropped up. I am of the belief that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. If I may daresay, you’re a heck of a strong woman.

Maybe one day, I will share my past but right now, I didn’t have the courage to do the ritual as you have. You have given me hope, that perhaps, one day, I can face my ancestry. I will have to start with my actual DNA to even begin to dig.

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:sunflower:Megan​:sunflower:
Thank you for sharing your a strong beautiful women with so much wisdom. I can relate to being able to have community with others. I love how we all share with eachother. That is so important to me. I feel like I known you for awhile.

Blockquote I think mental health is number one on my list. I won’t pretend to be perfect but being here with you on your journey is a honor. You are a blessing to me. I like your parent style and how you like Brigid. I even tried to get close to her and I understand why you love her so much. She is really helpful when it comes to home and parenting that’s why I liked her. But yeah I am going to work on my mental health and do some ritual! In the bath tub :soap: Thank you for all that you do!
Blessed be! :sparkles:

Jeannie
Blessed be

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