I don't care, he loves them

My 4 year old picked these out and is absolutely in love with them. He likes them and I don’t care who says what. For the first time I’m actually a little glad that my parents recently moved 4 hours away though.

They constantly bitch about his long hair, in front of him, so I’m pretty sure the first time they saw him in his new sandals would be the last time they saw him

Crocs Unisex-Child Classic Glitter Clog (Little Big Kid) https://a.co/d/4GSVuG2


Theyre fabulous, I’d wear them. My daughter had cowboy boots when she was younger, wore them everywhere, even to church (didnt go down well :joy:) but it made her happy. If he likes them, thats what counts. Hes only 4, and long hair is cool, Loki has long hair. :heart:


That’s just abuse, plain and simple… :slightly_frowning_face: The world is so much more beautiful and loving place when everyone is free to present in a way that makes them the happiest, regardless of age, family relation or anything else.



Absolutely. Well said :heart:


He has good taste. If I’m not moving fast enough for him in the morning he goes in my dresser and gets my clothes and does a pretty good job


Hes sounds great. Let him be himself. Blessings :heart:


I agree. The only reason I don’t shut them down is the argument it was start would be huge and traumatic. Gatherings were always at my parent’s house and being told to leave and probably never come back was not something I wanted him to deal with. I just kept trying to diffuse the situation.I go with things like
What!?! His hair looks great. Or Yes, it could use a little trim and point out a tiny spot Or His hair is beautiful.
Now it’s going too far. We’ve already discussed not going up for Christmas this year and after this last trip with my Aunt the next time she comes over I’m not dealing with it. I snapped at her this time and she backtracked a little but she was going too far.

I know that if I tell her off it will only be the one time because she will never speak to me again but it’s too much



When my oldest was in high school he had long hair & a full beard! (I remember when he was on the Babe Ruth Baseball team & the cut off was 15 years old, they made bring his school ID & his birth certificate because they didn’t believe that he was only 15 :laughing:) My father hated it & would tell him or me how much he didn’t like it in various ways. We just didn’t mention it & if he did then we cut the conversation short.

My daughter… I believe she has at least 3 pairs of Crocs… my middle son & his old girlfriend had matching Crocs… my daughter also gave me a pair of Crocs. When she got the doodads that you put in the holes she decorated mine with a few & at least 2 pairs of hers :thinking: maybe all 3 have them :rofl: I know that I had to bring one of the doodads to a coworker of my husband because he wears them all summer :joy: He has job site Crocs & office day Crocs. So I say let him rock whatever Crocs he wants, as long he is happy then there’s no need for anyone else to be bothered by it.


He’s amazing. Intense and stubborn and most days I wonder how I’m going to get through the day but he’s perfect and I wouldn’t change a thing. Although some days I do have a little mantra that I say to myself “Without this stubbornness he probably wouldn’t be here, without this stubbornness he probably wouldn’t be here…” :joy:

That’s it exactly. Anything else would break his spirit. I’m not going to force a square peg in a round hole because that’s what people think is ‘ normal ’


Unfortunately people will be. I read something somewhere that a Mom said they son had picked out a pair of pink shoes that he loved and was very proud of and some woman said something nasty and the light just went out in his eyes.

I’m not going to tolerate it. I figure “What!?! Those are the best shoes ever!!” would be good and something a little less child friendly if I get the chance


I’m proud of you for being his champion and making the most out of a difficult situation :hugs: :sparkling_heart:

Love this so much :pink_heart:


My daughter just bought a pair of pink crocs and she loves them. they cost me a pretty penny cuz she is now at the stage of ‘name brand’ (I have warned her not to expect EVERYTHING name brand).

hey if it makes them happy, lol


Maybe (s)he needs some girl clothes of his/her own? You know, speaking as someone who got through that kind of a transformation in her life. For me that would have been both a dream come true and an ultimate act of love and trust. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

It could be that, or it could be something else. Either way it’s beautiful and valid, just as (s)he is :pink_heart:


Those will be cute on him! Don’t make him conform, there are too many worker bees in the world and not enough butterflies!


First, Thank you for that. I think that assuming They may be insulting. I can understand not wanting to insult it seem intolerant but there’s just something that feels wrong to me that I can’t quite put into words. I say what I see until told otherwise and by the person or a friend. (Yes I realize how that sounds but hopefully y’all know what I’m trying to say) I have very limited experience so if I’m way off base, please tell me

I have thought about it and decided to just stay with leaving it as an option. When I’m buying, which is 99% of the time, I shop online and we sit down and I filter by age and price but do not filter by gender.

We were desperately look for jamas of his favorite show and we came across a pair that were 2 piece with a pink shirt and he was in love. I showed him all of the colors, he knows how to scroll through them now, and stayed with the pink one. The only reason he doesn’t have them yet is that they are crazy expensive, like twice the price of any other character jamas

I don’t know how much resistance you faced growing up but I think that not treating your child as who they are is as bad as physical abuse

My stepdaughter’s best friend’s mother was so horribly intolerant that when everything she tried at home didn’t work, she brought her before the church and when that didn’t work the mother actually turned her over to child services and terminated her parental rights. It took a while but she is finally comfortably dressing like who she is. She is so beautiful inside and out. I’m a little jealous of her physical beauty :laughing:

Almost as bad with my neice’s boyfriend

My son’s ex-boyfriend’s father was still trying to wrap his head around it but was very supportive

My son’s then boyfriend was my first experience and I said to someone how proud I was of him for seeing him for who he really is no matter what anyone said and I was scolded for being ignorant of the way the world is

Not the same I grew up in the 90s and 2 girls were caught holding hands and “acting like a couple” and were literally forced to walked on opposite sides of the hall and at change of period teachers would stand outside their classroom to enforce the rule. That was the horrible thinking that I was used to

Those girls died in a horrific unexplainable car accident

All anyone should care about is children being happy and healthy and comfortable with themselves


I have spent my whole life, until I met my now husband, being whoever I was expected to be in order to be safe.

My bio mother always presents a much nicer version of herself than she really is she taught me to always pretend that someone was watching me and that way if always be at my best.

I will NEVER make my children feel like that.

I’m still trying to get rid of that thinking but I’m working on it

Beautiful. That may end up as a sign on my wall


Mine usually get name brand but only because there are a few stores where I am that have crazy sales a few times a year and I am always checking


Absolutely don’t tolerate that at all. My kids grew up around people doing different things & wearing costumes, different types of hats, colored hair, using different props, & mannequins that changed outfits based on the theme that weekend or the holiday at any given time throughout the year. We were nowhere near ‘normal’. We cheered each other on & didn’t care what anyone else thought because it made us happy. :blush: They also go or went to school with all kinds of kids & they didn’t care as long as they were good people & happy in their own skin.


“Being normal is vastly overrated” Halloweentown is one of my favorite movies

Exactly. I have referred to my family as a bunch of crazy ass misfits and they are all perfectly fine with it


Pronouns are difficult… I really like how in Finnish there’s just one gender neutral pronoun. They is a good choice to fall back to if someone hasn’t told you their pronouns, or when writing gender neutral language and not talking about anyone in particular. Usually the advice “ask the person for their pronouns” is good, but vulnerable people, triggers, anxiety… really need to be gentle there. Sometimes it’s good to just listen and observe.

I like that a lot :pink_heart:

I grew up in the 90’s too, and in my school “gay” was the most common insult, and no one even knew what “trans” was. I was just a very confused little girl, who was being told by everyone I was a boy, I didn’t know but to accept it and wonder why I never quite fit in with the other boys.

In my teens I did start to get some feelings, as to how I’d like to present myself, and they were very private fantasies, I just couldn’t trust anyone with them. It was not until Wikipedia came around, that I could get some real information, that made things click… and almost to my 30’s before I could gather the courage to actually do something about it.

I was completely alone through 95% of it, and I was so used to it I couldn’t even dream of it being otherwise… if there’s one thing I could spare someone else following in my footsteps, that would be it. :heart:

Oh dear, that reads to me like a cartoon villain who gets foiled at every step of fulfilling their evil plan, and you’d almost feel sorry for them if they weren’t trying something absolutely rotten… :sweat_smile: I’m glad the heroine of the story got her happy ever after, what a radiant beauty she must be :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

I think you were very sweet and encouraging :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:
The “way the world is”, is so subjective… but I don’t have to tell you that :hugs: :heart:

Me too, and it took ages to deprogram, and restoring my sense of safety is still a work in progress…

I couldn’t agree more :sob:
You’re a good mother and you have a heart of gold, anyone who tries to tell you otherwise is not to be taken seriously :people_hugging: :heart: