Weekly Witchy Challenge - Freedom in Forgiveness - My Entry
I did an Internet search about Forgiveness & Freedom, and this is some of what I learned:
Why is forgiveness difficult?
It has the power to release freedom and happiness. It has the power to allow us to move forward without ever having to focus on the past. When we fail to forgive, it has the power to bind us and hold us captive to hurt and pain. … With this in mind, it is important to remember what forgiveness is really about.
Forgiveness is not justice . Justice usually involves an acknowledgment of wrongdoing, an apology, and some form of reward or punishment. Forgiveness should occur whether justice is withheld or not. Forgiveness is not about changing the other person, their actions, or their behavior.
True forgiveness means acknowledging that our suffering matters—to us, the one who’s lived it—whether or not the other person ever agrees with us. We say, you matter—to our own heart. And it bears repeating … we do all this with or without the other’s awareness. Forgiveness is an inside job.
Forgiveness can be a gift to yourself or to others, it may be something you receive, but it can also be a quality that describes a relationship where one must be capable of self-forgiveness in order to forgive others . … If hope gives you wings, forgiveness will often be what you will need to get off the ground
In other words, to forgive someone is to acknowledge that a wrong has been committed, but you do not hold that against a person. In light of these points, here are some characteristics of grace and forgiveness: patience, kindness, mercy, and most of love.
Forgiveness is defined as letting go of past grudges or lingering anger against a person or persons. When you are mad at someone but you then accept his apology and are no longer mad, this is an example of forgiveness. … The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.
Forgiveness doesn’t equal trust and it doesn’t t mean there won’t be consequences for the person or relationship and boundaries that need changing. Forgiveness will challenge you to grow — to love more deeply and to learn more about life and interacting with people. But, more importantly, forgiveness will set you free!
Simply put, forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. It sets you free from the bitterness and hurt you’re feeling inside. … On the other hand, Trust is not the same as forgiveness . Trust requires consistent action by the offender in order for trust to be granted.
When we hold on to hurt, pain, resentment, and anger it harms us far more than it harms the offender. Forgiveness frees us to live in the present. Reliving the wrong that was done to us keeps us living in the past and missing today’s beauty. Forgiveness allows us to move on without anger or contempt or seeking revenge.
But forgiveness does not mean acceptance. It never means saying it is ok what happened to you, or it was acceptable that someone hurt you. This is where people often get confused. You forgive someone for you, not for the other person.
From the ancient Greeks to the present day, forgiveness has typically been regarded as a personal response to having been injured or wronged, or as a condition, one seeks or hopes is bestowed upon one for having wronged someone else.
The negative consequences of not forgiving have been documented in studies that show that it can lead to emotional pain of anger, hate, hurt, resentment, bitterness and so on and as a consequence can create health issues, affect relationships and stop us from experiencing the freedom that forgiveness enables.
Forgiveness may not always be easy, but it can be easier with a few exercises and the right mindset. First, keep in mind that forgiveness is something you do for yourself to sever your emotional attachment to what happened.
True forgiveness means acknowledging that our suffering matters—to us, the one who’s lived it—whether or not the other person ever agrees with us. We say, you matter—to our own heart. And it bears repeating … we do all this with or without the other’s awareness. Forgiveness is an inside job
Forgiveness means giving up the suffering of the past and being willing to forge ahead with far greater potential for inner freedom. Besides the reward of letting go of a painful past, there are powerful health benefits that go hand-in-hand with the practice of forgiveness.
I checked this out first: How to write a forgiveness letter for self-healing; and I also checked
this out: How to write a forgiveness letter to yourself.
So after all I learned about Forgiveness, I decided I wanted Freedom from all of this Hurt,
Pain & Hurting Myself. I wrote up three Letters; one for my Sister, one for Justin, & one for Me. I laid out the hurts they have given to me and how they hurt me. I also told them how I have hurt them also and that keeping all of this hurt, resentment, anger, sadness, isn’t truly me. I have always found it easier to forgive others than to wait for them to Apologize to me; but when I’ve asked them to forgive me of the things I did or said, I usually from these two never got an answer, or with Justin, he would say yes when I asked for his forgiveness only to find out later, 3 years later and he lied to me about the reason he ended our relationship.
Then I lit a Pink & White Candles
I followed this Guided Meditation Forgiveness is Your Liberation: A Meditation for forgiveness & freedom by Dr. Arianna Opper on YouTube. Forgiveness is Your Liberation: A Meditation for Forgiveness & Freedom - YouTube
After the guided meditation I burned all three letters in my cauldron on my altar.
I blew out each candle and when they were all only ashes, I went outside and off of my property and let them blow in the wind of the universe. I do feel the weight being lifted off of my shoulders and I feel more at ease about forgiving them and myself.