There are so many great replies here
You’re definitely not alone, my friend!
Energy is a curious thing, and I can attest that meditations and visualizations are tricky by nature- even those with a natural talent for it still have a lot of room to grow and improve. At the end of the day, meditation, visualizations, and energy work are not personality traits nor inherent features, but skills- they manifest differently for different people, and can always be nurtured and developed further.
In one of the meditation books I read, the author made a great point that even when they had what some would consider a “bad” meditation (their mind wandered the entire time and they felt they couldn’t focus at all), it was still a worthwhile experience- simply the act of trying can help bring peace, stability, focus and improve your overall practice
In that sense, there is no such thing as a “bad” meditation- if you’re trying, you’re doing great!
Additionally, meditation and energy work come in so many forms- while some people enjoy guided meditations to listen along with, others prefer to embark on grand visualized adventures. To others, the best meditation is to not visualize anything at all- empty mind meditations are popular in Zen traditions and are very peaceful (despite being really difficult to do, in my experience! )
Again, with so many styles and options out there, there’s no wrong way to meditate or do energy work. And if you feel like whatever you’re currently doing isn’t helping you in the way you’d like, my best advice would be to switch it up and explore some new methods! Perhaps there’s another method or style that will give you a new experience
Adding in my love and support too, Amethyst!