Greetings @LaurelDeaArtio 
You are a very loving mother to care so much for your daughter, she is blessed to have you!
From what you’ve written, your daughter seems to be cut from the same cloth as someone very dear to me. Although there were many attempts from loved ones to get her to calm down and learn how to think before acting, it became apparent over the years that change needed to come from within- no matter what I or others did, her emotions and behavior were in her own hands.
So I know first hand how difficult it is to watch someone you love constantly self destroy. And I understand your strong emotions in wanting to help them! 
However, as others have mentioned, casting spells on others walk a tricky line with spellwork ethics- it depends largely on where you decide to draw the line. Rather than directly cast a spell on your daughter, have you considered giving her a magickal item- such as a talisman, amulet, or charm?
You could craft or enchant a piece of jewelry for her to carry with her. Depending on how you cast, you could choose properties of calm, anti-anxiety, mindfulness, etc. Tips and advice (as well as spells) for making magic items can be found in the previous Making Objects Magickal Challenge.
You could also gift her a crystal for her to carry with her- such as Clear Quartz (clear mind) or Lepidolite (lower stress and anxiety) or Aquamarine (soothing and relaxing) or Amethyst (soothes irritability and anger) 
There’s also this Family Unity Spell Bag to help promote understanding and bonds between family:
Others here have offered some great advice about consulting a specialist- such as a doctor or a psychologist, which I agree with as well. I’ve found that sometimes problems can be solved magically, sometimes with mundane methods, but most often problems benefit from a bit of help from both.
Sending love and light to both you and your daughter, Laurel! Blessed be! 