Some already know and some may not but I’ve hit a particularly stormy, nerve wrecking, painful patch in my life and while things are very slowly starting to look up or spark a little hope other things keep knocking me back down. Today I’m struggling hard with the pain I feel inside and as a result I’ve gotten none of the things I needed to do done and that means I missed the zoom meeting for nothing. But worst than that is I’m having a hard time keeping myself from reaching out and begging my husband to forget about the divorce and just hold me till the pieces he left me in fall back together. I know I need to fight that urge and I need to move on but I just don’t know how to say goodbye to my other half. How do I just walk away from the person who balanced me so completely that I found home in his arms and saw forever in his eyes? I’ve been trying to come up with some spell or ritual that will help me let go and start healing because it’s what’s best for us both but I can’t seem to find anything to help with strength, heartache, willpower and courage. I tried the cord cutting that @SilverBear and demonstrated Cut The Cords In her post and I’ve also tried the Release Spell on the main site and nothing. I’m so lost and drowning in the painful void he left me to face alone and it’s not healthy for me or my witchling to be so in true form when I don’t know what else to do I’m bringing my pain and deepest needs to my family here. Give me every suggestion u have be it advice, spells rituals or even ingredients that I can use to add to a spell for what I need.
I am so sorry to hear you are struggling. I feel your pain. hug
It sounds so cliché but time does heal. Give yourself time to go through the emotions.
You’ll be sad, you’ll be angry, you’ll feel rage, pain, and everything in between.
Allow them to happen. Do so without judgement. Just acknowledge and know it’s OK to not be OK.
It’s OK to feel the feelings.
It could take several cord cuttings - don’t rely on just one if the ties are deep. I recommend doing them for at least a week. Everyday for 1 week. At least.
Always followed by a white light protection visualization.
Try some guided meditations -
Try some self love/self compassion -
Carry crystals that help with grief. YES, this is a form of grieving.
Apache Tears, Obsidian, Aquamarine, Calcite, Agate, Lapis Lazuli, Malachite, Angelite, Rhodochrosite, and Tourmaline all excellent for grief.
Use elemental water - No rain? Use your shower.
@phoenix_dawn aw hon I’m so sorry that you are hurting. If you want to talk or vent I am happy to listen. Sometimes it’s easier to talk to someone you don’t know very well. Here are a few spells from my bos that may help you. They will need some adjustments. Sending you love and healing vibes.
🫂 lots of hugs my friend
I went through a painful divorce almost 2 years ago. He was my best friend, so I can empathize with you completely. I agree with what @SilverBear said about allowing yourself to go though the emotions. It was a mistake I made, not allowing them because I felt I needed to be some sort of bada$$. Yes, it hurts, but the grief process is so necessary. And I promise, you’ll be an even more beautiful butterfly on the other side
I’m so sorry for you. I agree with the others, to let yourself feel. I know it’s hard and it hurts but you are strong and can get through it. I’m sorry I don’t have any cool spells or tips for you, I wish I could wave my wand and make it better but time is the only thing that will do it.
Calling on Aphrodite to heal your broken heart is the only thing I can think of. Maybe that will help.
If you want to be distracted or something, PM me, and I’ll talk your ear off. I’m not good at relationships at all but I can talk Harry Potter theories at you till you are distracted and convinced Dumbledore was one of the bad guys. LOL.
Till then I’ll be keeping you in my prayers and sending you love and light.
I am sending you love and light @pheonix_dawn at this time. I am feeling your pain and can imagine what you must be going through at this time. I really do reccomend that you give yourself time to heel as painful as it may sound.
The others have shared some really beneficial spells thus far along with some meditation videos. Since I am a witch of the word, I would recommend simple chants of even daily positive affirmations to help you by at this time.
You can make a healing sigil and carry it with you along with a rose quartz. Before you go to bed you can also light a white candle to seek the comfort and positive energy you may need. I wish you well and good healing.
Oh Miss M. I’m so sorry you’re facing such a hard time. When a young girl marries they used to have what I call "the Cinderella complex. You fall in love, marry and live happily ever after … Bologna. That’s when the hard work begins. As unfortunately happens to some, love can break. You have to move on. I won’t ask about your divorce, it isn’t my business. Divorce is almost like facing a death, you go through the 7 stages of grief. Which don’t last about a year as the books say. As each person is different so is their grief. Regardless of what some know it all author writes, there’s no such thing as an amicable divorce, or you wouldn’t have separated to begin with. Your grief is personal. You have to rise above all the horsesh-t.
Lord have mercy Girl, you are so strong and have been through so much and your innate goodness just shines through. You’ve made some mistakes, so what? Anybody who says they haven’t is suffering from delusions of godhead.
Stay good , Stay strong .
Sending you buckets of love and endurance.
Lit a white candle for you and baby bump.
Stay with us.
Well, I don’t know the history like the others here, and I have no spell suggestions. I am only about 80% divorced myself (property divided, just need the final decree). Some days my daughter refuses to talk to me. I’m not trying to compare myself to you, it’s just that so many of us have been through/are going through what you are. This sucks out loud - I know too well the feeling in your heart right now. But you will get to the other side. It can be done. A little non-witchy advice? Keep yourself busy. Journal, read, watch tv (as a last resort!) Call a friend, play a video game - anything to keep your mind busy and off of him. I found that sometimes my mind wouldn’t leave it alone and I had to be active - walk, bicycle, smack golf balls. Treat it like an addiction and do everything you can think of to not scratch that itch. It will go away eventually and you’ll heal, even though it might feel like dying right now. You can do this.
Hi, I am new here and I obviously don’t know your situation, but I could feel the pain as I read your words. I went through a divorce a few years ago and can relate to the struggle all too well. I promise, it gets better, but I know that’s easy to say from where I sit now. I have always loved cord-cutting meditations and am going to check out SilverBear’s videos myself. I don’t know if this will be helpful at all or if you’d be interested, but I am a yoga teacher who works with women who have PTSD and C-PTSD. We physically store emotional and spiritual pain within our bodies. Especially within the connective tissue. I have found that some specific exercises and somatic movements while engaging in a cord-cutting meditation can be highly effective. Again, I don’t know you and this might not be something appropriate to this forum, so I apologize if this isn’t something I should mention here. It’s also advisable to work with a therapist while releasing these emotions that are imbedded within the body. Please let me know if I can help in any way. Sending love and light to you.
Also, I don’t know if you’re familiar with EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique- which is sometimes just referred to as “tapping”) but it works with the same somatic theory. It’s similar to acupuncture or acupressure in principle and you don’t need anything other than your own hands to do it. I also just want to clarify that II wasn’t trying to sell you anything in my previous post (or now-lol), I could just suggest specific movements for you to try if you’re interested. Blessings.
@BrightBear yes please. At this point I’m willing to try anything because at this point I barely sleep or eat and I still have to be mom to a teenager as well. I hate that I am so broken right now that I can barely pass as a functioning human being. Makes me glad the weekly challenge was just sharing information and shout outs because I didn’t really have to do much work or risk any wonky results
Also I would just like to thank you all for the comforting words of encouragement. I know it’s partly hormones making this so much worse. My first 2 divorces were a breeze in comparison. With the first it was pure relief and my second husband and I are still good friends because we married out of convenience and realized we were much better friends than spouses and tossed the rings out the door. I’ve never really let anyone get this close to me so it wouldn’t be like this when they leave. I can handle it when people waltz out as quickly as they come in folks have done it my whole 34 years and that’s kinfolks too. I don’t know what makes it so different but my whole world has been shaken up like a snow globe
Some things are not meant to be fixed. Some wounds will never heal and as such come to define some part of us. I speak from the worst depths of experience and just know that all ends can be a beginning. My experience was similar and yet not at all the same. There are no words to express the empathy I have for you and just know that there are many here who wish you only the best.
Do you have any experience with yoga? I just want to know where you are with it so I can suggest the right poses. Also, are you familiar with EFT? Another thing, when I was thinking of your situation, I heard the words “watermelon tourmaline.” It definitely didn’t come from my brain! I mean, it’s a wonderful stone, but I haven’t used it or thought of it in quite a while, so I feel like it was a suggestion meant for you.
Good insight. I pictured The Tower and The Star tarot cards when I read this. You’ve obviously been there too, and I wish you well.
Ok so I just read this and skimmed over the first few replies and he sent a message saying he was headed home so I’ma visualize protection over me and my daughter for the night and hope all goes well. Pray for the both of us please and I will look into this more tomorrow. Thanks so much for telling me about this it’s like I was ment to get in touch with you phoenix_dawn. Blessed be.
I’m so sorry to hear of your struggle and broken heart. I know we haven’t had the opportunity to get to know one another yet but I am here to tell you we got your back on this forum. You’re not alone, the people here will support and listen to you and offer guidance and love as needed. This last few years I too experianced some radical life changes that honestly made me belive there were no more tomorrows left that could ever truly matter or produce happiness or fulfillment for me again after my losses. I was done ready to walk away from it all a beautiful life and a bussiness I built for the last 6 years. I was just so uderly broken it was like being dead stuck in an active body that could feel nothing but pain and suffering. I began to let my bussnes,life and relationships decay. I just didnt care and completly lost myself in my loss. I became the “Hermit” and closed the world out. But then the most beautiful thing occured and the person I was that day died in the transformation. finally I emerged in the calm,I was free from the pain and sorrow that had plaged me most of my life and the noise of the world .I could breathe , cry , grow, heal and that’s just what I did. It took some time ,changed me and I felt more emotion then I knew was humanly possible. Living so close to the vail I believe I connected to spirit , I discovered myself and the power to heal . I suddenly devolped this drive and thirst for all the magickal and healing knowlege I could access . Evently I found and healed my inner child through meditation , hypnosis, yoga, the craft , NLP , aromatherapy and working with herbs finding a happiness I never nee existed before . Amazingly enough I simply learned to quite the outside pain and suffering that kept me from being me and allowed my true self to be born after shedding my prior self image. Now I’m truly a diffrent person. My advice to you woud be to take refuge , retreat take shelter and look with in. Allow yourself to feel, cry, remember to process and let go of what no longer serves your soul path. find what you love about yourself as you are and move forward in stregth and confidence. Take a few days to allow yourself to do some soul searching and shadow work for radical self care.
Treat yourself to a beautiful self love ritual bath .
collect a white candle to omit positivity and a black candle to absorb negativity and evil - enchant, carve, speak and or dress the candles with your intention and place safely in the bathroom to be used while in bath.
Allow yourself to process your emoticons and feel what comes up as you prepare your bath
Suggested stones: Clear quarts, rose quarts,
amethyst , black onyx or black tourmaline -
place stones near your tub .
select a guided meditation off you tube that fits your purpose and set up for later in the bath
proceed to the kitchen to make your bath potion and collect any flowers or fruits you wish to add for ambiance and or to wash yourself with during bath.
Boil 1 cup water
add 1 cup Milk
add 1/4 cup honey
remove from heat / stir
add 1-2 sleepy time tea packet or dry herbs of choice to the potion ( sleepy time is great for relaxing)
add a dash of olive oil with
3 drops of each essential oil peppermint ( stress and headache reducing ) , lavender ( love and calming ) and chamomile ( peace, love and relaxation)
cut up some fresh citrus fruit ( sunshine ) in a separate bowl to take to the bath too .
add the potion and or any flowers / fruits to the bath or save the fruit to eat for a refreshing boost during the bath . Try washing with the fruit peels, flowers or herbs too !!
I have to say that sounds sweet and relaxing. I’ve also nvr felt more support or at home or even accepted than I do now at this point in my life. Everyone here is always willing to lend a helping hand offer words of kindness and lend a helping hand no matter the situation. Thank you all so very much. This family and sense of security and peace is exactly what was needed in my life at a time like this. I feel like at the point I can eat my darn cup noodles cuddle my baby girl and turn to my pillow for some rest finally. I can’t wait to try this bath tho I’ve nvr been big on baths but love fresh fruit this Will definitely be a must try for tomorrow evening thanks so much gn everyone and blessed be.